By Rock Hudson
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Extra info for Rock Hudson: His Story
It rained Monday evening, and when the ambulance drove out with Rock, there were no reporters around. Dr. Dormont and Dr. de Vernejoul followed in a separate car. When Rock was transferred to the helicopter, they said good-bye to Yanou. " Rock was sleeping-he'd been given a sedative. The helicopter landed at Charles de Gaulle Airport in an area beyond customs, where photographers were not allowed. Rock was carried on a stretcher into the 747, and the stretcher was placed across a row of seats. Rock woke up and saw Yanou standing by him.
Rock had dropped from 225 pounds to 170. He could barely keep food down. His body was covered with rashes that itched and drove him mad. He started to forget appointments, and wandered around the house and grounds in his jockey shorts. Besides his doctors, only four people in the world knew Rock had AIDS: Mark Miller, his secretary; George Nader, who lived with Miller; James Wright; and Dean Dittman, an actor friend whom Rock had confided in shortly after learning he had the disease. For a year, these four had watched helplessly as Rock faded before their eyes, yet insisted on working and keeping up the illusion that nothing was wrong.
Rock Hudson would be unmasked. Perhaps there was some relief in the unburdening. There would be no further tension or anxiety. He could let go. Everything was over: life, career, the world. What did it matter? Rock could not know or even guess, at that moment, that with the death of the illusion, something new would be created. Yanou finished reading. Rock stared at her, then said, "Okay. " Mark Miller watched from the window of a private conference room as Yanou walked out to face the press on the hospital steps.